[5.16] Beware Of Greeks




Beware Of Greeks                              Written by David Lloyd 
                                              Directed by Jeff Melman
=====================================================================
Production Code: 5.16.
Original Airdate on NBC: 17th March 1998
Transcript written on 14th July 2000
Transcript revised on 4th June 2001
This transcript may not be complete because of syndication cuts.

Transcript {mike lee}

[ACT ONE]

[Scene One – KACL.
Frasier is wrapping up his show.]

Frasier: Well, that's all the time we have for this afternoon, 
         Seattle.  This is Dr. Frasier Crane, wishing you good 
         afternoon, and good mental health.

[He goes off the air and starts gathering his things into his 
briefcase.  Roz comes into his booth.]

    Roz: Frasier, if I ask your opinion about something, will you 
         give me an honest answer and not just tell me what you think 
         I want to hear?
Frasier: Absolutely, Roz.  Anytime, all you have to do is ask.

[Behind his back, Roz puts on a new hat.  Frasier turns around, 
looks — and heads for the door.]

    Roz: Oh, I knew it.
Frasier: Oh, no, no, Roz, I'm just kidding.  I love it!
    Roz: Really?
Frasier: Yes, it looks great.
    Roz: Are you sure?
Frasier: Trust me.
    Roz: O.K.  It's just in my condition I'm just a little insecure.  
         You know, every time I see something cute in the window, I 
         remember how I look and I think, "no way."

[A handsome, dark-haired young man appears in the glass, sees 
Frasier, and knocks, grinning.]

    Roz: Here we go again.
Frasier: Gosh, that's my cousin!  Nikos!  What are you doing here?
  Nikos: [coming through the door] I was in the neighborhood, I 
         thought I'd stop by!

[They hug.]

Frasier: Oh, it's great to see you!  My God, it's been ages.  Oh yes, 
         I'd like you to meet my producer, Roz Doyle.
    Roz: [shaking hands] Hi.
Frasier: This is Nikos, my father's brother's son.
    Roz: Well, I would have never pegged you for a Crane.
Frasier: Oh, well, he's half Greek.  He gets his looks from his mom.
    Roz: I'll bet he gets looks from lots of women.
Frasier: Roz!
  Nikos: It's nice to meet you.
    Roz: Yeah, you too.  You know, I never knew Frasier had a cousin.
  Nikos: I think he's ashamed of me.  Why else would he turn down an 
         invitation to my wedding?
Frasier: You're getting married?
  Nikos: Yeah, on Saturday.  Don't tell me you didn't get the 
         invitation.
Frasier: Well, no, it's the first I'm hearing of it!
  Nikos: I knew it.  I knew Mom wasn't telling the truth.  She said 
         she never heard back from you.
Frasier: She must still be nursing that grudge.
    Roz: Uh-oh, this sounds like, you know, personal, private, family 
         stuff. [sits in Frasier's chair and puts her feet up] So, 
         what's this grudge you're talking about?
  Nikos: Oh, it's all so silly.  Mom has never forgiven Frasier for 
         some career advice he gave me.  And, trust me, he saved me 
         from going down the wrong path.
Frasier: Well, thank you, Nikos.  Well, I'd certainly hate to miss 
         this wedding.  I wonder if there's some way we could work 
         this out.  You want to go grab a cup of coffee?
  Nikos: Sure.
Frasier: Great!
    Roz: So, what was the wrong path?
Frasier: Oh, Roz, it's rather a long story—
  Nikos: My folks wanted me to go to medical school.
    Roz: Ah, so what path did you choose instead?
Frasier: We don't really have the time to into all that right now—
  Nikos: I became a juggler.  I perform on street corners.
    Roz: Ah, I see.  And all because of his advice.  Tell me, do 
         people sometimes toss you coins?
  Nikos: Sure, lots of times.
    Roz: [handing him her hat] Well, here's something you can catch 
         them in.

[Scene Two – Apartment
Frasier has just delivered the news to Martin, who is having his 
blood pressure taken by Daphne.  Niles is pouring himself sherry.]

 Martin: You and your damned advice!
 Daphne: Mr. Crane, Dr. Rudnik asked me to monitor your blood 
         pressure, and I'd like to get an accurate reading.
Frasier: Stop pointing fingers.  Why don't we try to solve this 
         problem?
 Martin: I don't see how!  She's a vindictive woman, and she's gonna 
         keep on punishing us because of you!  If you kept your big 
         trap shut for just once in your life, my nephew would 
         probably be a surgeon now, and I'd be going to his wedding!
 Daphne: There, now — 240 over 11.  Sounds about right!
  Niles: Personally, I'd have loved to have gone, but this is clearly 
         a snub and we Crane men have our pride.  Right, Dad?
Frasier: Oh, stop it, Niles!  You're just afraid of seeing Cousin 
         Yvonne, aren't you?
 Daphne: Who's Cousin Yvonne?
Frasier: Oh, a distant cousin who has a slight crush on Niles.
  Niles: "A slight crush?"  There are cannibals who are less man-
         hungry.
 Daphne: That's funny, I've always thought it would be kind of 
         romantic to have a secret admirer, someone who longed for me 
         that much.  But I do see your point, Dr. Crane.  When you 
         think about it, it is kind of sick.
  Niles: Yeah, well, perhaps "sick" is a tad judgmental.
 Martin: I can't believe that because of your big mouth, Zora won't 
         even let me in her restaurant!
Frasier: Forcing you to go elsewhere when you have one of your 
         frequent cravings for stuffed grape leaves and zither music!
  Niles: It's a moot point.  We're not invited, thanks to Frasier's 
         more-than-usually inept advice.

[He clinks his glass against Frasier's.]

 Martin: Can you imagine what it's like to live in the same city as 
         your brother, and not see him for five years?
Frasier: No, but I'd like to give it a try.  Dad, I think that we 
         should go to this wedding.
 Martin: Forget it, Zora doesn't want us there.
Frasier: But Nikos wants us there!  My God, I watched that boy grow 
         up!  I want to be there when he gets married!
 Daphne: I'd like to venture an opinion here.  I know this doesn't 
         exactly concern me, but I feel very strongly about this.  I 
         like zither music, and I always have!

[She goes to her room.  Silence for a moment.]

Frasier: And we're back!  Listen, Dad—
 Martin: No, drop it, Frasier.  If my brother's wife doesn't see fit 
         to invite me, I am not just going to show up.

[He gets up and goes to his room.]

  Niles: End of story, case closed, that's all she wrote!
Frasier: Oh, stop it, Niles.  There are more important issues at 
         stake here than you being mauled by Yvonne the Terrible!  
         Dad is hurt, can't you see that?  He misses his brother.  
         Well, it's my fault, and I'm going to put it right. [picks 
         up the phone and dials] I'm going to get in touch with Aunt 
         Zora.  Surely she'll listen to reason. [into phone] Aunt 
         Zora? [she hangs up] Well, that's encouraging.  She 
         remembered my voice.
  Niles: Frasier, just give up.
Frasier: No!  She can't avoid me if I go down and meet her face-to-
         face. [gets his coat] I'm going to go to that restaurant.
  Niles: Do you have a death wish?  She'll eat you alive!
Frasier: Oh, I'm not afraid of her!
  Niles: Everyone is!  Have you forgotten the family legend that when 
         Hitler invaded Greece she joined the partisans just so she 
         could strangle Nazis?
Frasier: I have never believed that.  She would have to have been 
         five years old at the time!
  Niles: Well, that's why the legend says they were strangled with 
         jump ropes.
Frasier: Stop it!

[They go out the door.]

WELCOME TO HELL'S KITCHEN
[Scene Three – Kitchen. The restaurant's kitchen, bustling with activity.] [At the center is Zora — a short, muscular Greek woman — tenderizing a steak with a mallet. A waiter comes in.] Zora: Dmitri, pick up your order, don't make me hurt you again! [Dmitri grabs a waiting tray and scuttles out, terrified. Frasier comes in. Zora sees him — and redoubles her assault on the steak, pounding the stuffing out of it. Frasier turns and runs, then steels his courage and comes back in.] Frasier: Aunt Zora, I realize I'm not the most welcome person here, but— [Zora spits at his feet.] Frasier: It is not fair to take my mistake out on your husband, or my father! [Zora ignores him and walks around the kitchen, issuing orders to the cooks. Frasier follows her, weaving through the maze of tables and counters.] Frasier: They didn't do anything! Zora: [tasting a dish] More pepper! Frasier: You have a wedding coming up, you should be joyous! Zora: Sponge off this countertop! Frasier: Nikos tells me his fiancee's a lovely young woman from a wealthy family, that you like her very much! Zora: Mop up this slop! Frasier: So your heart should be brimming with motherly emotions! Zora: [picks up a bent skewer] When I find out who bent this skewer, I'm ramming it right in his eye! Frasier: [trying to lighten the moment] You know, I've always wanted to do this: make a trip around the Greek Islands! [One of the cooks laughs. Zora gives him a vicious slap. Then she picks up a meat cleaver and starts slicing a steak on a cutting board.] Frasier: Aunt Zora, my point is that we are family, and we should be together. And I promise that if you invite us to this wedding, I will never give Nikos another piece of advice for as long as I live. [Zora stops slicing and looks up.] Frasier: I'm through meddling, you have my word. And if you do invite us to the wedding, I also promise that I'll promote this wonderful, wonderful restaurant of yours on my radio program. [Zora's face is expressionless, but she seems to be considering it.] Frasier: Every day for a... month? [Zora slams the cleaver into the wood, making him jump.] Zora: [joyous] Frasier! [She throws her arms around him.] Frasier: You forgive me! Zora: Of course, of course! And you don't just come to the wedding! You come to the rehearsal dinner too! Tomorrow night, right here, because we are family! Here, eat! [She grabs a spoonful of something from a pot and shoves it in his mouth. The taste is enough to make him gag, but he converts his since into an emotive grimace.] Zora: My very special kokaretski, for a very special nephew! Oh God, I'm such a softie! I'll be crying in a minute! [She hugs him again.] Frasier: [mouth still full] Me, too! [END OF ACT ONE] [ACT TWO]
LORD OF THE DANCE
[Scene Four – Restaurant The rehearsal party is in full swing, packed with guests. A bouzouki plays in the corner, and some people are dancing.] [Frasier comes in, followed by a very tightly-wound Niles.] Niles: Well, I hope you enjoy yourself, Mr. Blessed-Are-the- Peacemakers! Frasier: Will you stop complaining? The rehearsal went beautifully. Cousin Yvonne didn't even get near you. Niles: How could she? I spent half the time hiding in the confessional! By the way, Mrs. Pappas is having an affair. [Zora comes over, followed by Martin's younger brother Ed with a video camera.] Zora: There they are, my two favorite nephews! [hugs them] Ed, get me with the boys! [poses with them] You know, I am so glad you are coming to the wedding tomorrow. There is nothing sadder than a divided family, am I right? Frasier: Quite right. Niles: Absolutely, absolutely. When Frasier told me we weren't invited to the wedding, I— Yvonne: There you are, Niles! Niles: Just kill me now. [Yvonne — a powerfully-built, curly-haired woman in a tight blue dress that shows off her ample cleavage — attaches herself to Niles's arm.] Niles: Hello, Yvonne. Yvonne: I haven't seen you two in a long time! Niles: [eyes on her bosom] Oh well, I haven't seen your two in a long time — "you, too," "you, too!" Yvonne: Oh, well, we've got a lot of catching up to do. Let's go get us a glass of bubbly! Niles: Oh, you know, I don't think so— Zora: Oh, go on, enjoy! it's none of that sissy French wine, it's real Greek champagne! Frasier: Ooh, save some for me Niles! [Yvonne drags Niles away. Frasier blends into the crowd. Martin comes in with Daphne.] Zora: And here he is, my favorite brother-in-law! Martin, it's been too long! Martin: It sure has. Say, where's Walt? We got a lot of catching up to do. Zora: Oh, don't worry, he'll be here. [noticing Daphne] Who is this pretty young thing? Martin: Oh, this is Daphne Moon. She's my physical therapist. Zora: Oh. That's what they call it these days? [slaps him playfully] You dirty old man! [She shakes a fist and moves off laughing. Martin tries to simultaneously correct her and mollify Daphne, who's saying "I've never been so insulted!" etc., etc.] [In another corner, Nikos introduces a pretty young blond woman to Frasier.] Nikos: This is my fiancée, Mary-Ann Taubeneck. Frasier: Mary-Ann, it's a pleasure. Taubeneck? As in the Taubeneck Building? Mary-Ann: Yeah, and Taubeneck Park, etc., etc. That was my grandfather, the original robber baron. Nikos: Mary-Ann has some issues with her family. [Mary-Ann points to her parents, a well-dressed, middle-aged couple sitting at a table, whose disposition is definitely more funereal than matrimonial.] Mary-Ann: Look at them sulking over there. You should have seen their faces when I told them I was marrying a street person. Nikos: Performer. Street performer. Mary-Ann: Oh, right. Anyway, they've got it coming after all the debutante nonsense they put me through. [waves to someone] Would you excuse me? [She walks away.] Nikos: Great, isn't she? Frasier: Yes. How did you meet? Nikos: A few months back, I performed at one of her parents' garden parties. They were really snooty to me. That seemed to spark something in her. She asked me for a date right in front of them. That's how she is. She likes to play with her parents' heads. Frasier: Yes, well, so did Lizzie Borden. Nikos: What do you mean? Frasier: Oh, I can't help thinking that... nothing. Just a bad joke. She seems like a lovely girl. Nikos: Yeah, she really is. My family adores her. You should hear my mom, she thinks Crystal's the best thing that ever happened to me. Frasier: Crystal? Nikos: Did I say that? I mean Mary-Ann. I must have been admiring the beautiful crystal over there, that's why I called her crystal. Frasier: Yes, it's a good thing you weren't admiring the pork-butt! Nikos: I'm so nervous these days, I don't know what I'm saying. I guess it's just a case of pre-wedding jitters, right? [Zora comes over.] Zora: Nikos, Nikos, go check on the sous-chef, make sure he isn't into the ouzo! [Nikos goes into the kitchen.] Zora: Last time, he drank until he got his head caught in the duck press. Frasier: Oh, really? How did he manage that? Zora: [friendly menace] With my help. So, what were you and Nikos talking about? Frasier: Oh, now, now, now, Aunt Zora, don't you worry. I made you a promise, and I'd die before I'd break it. Zora: Or soon after. So, you met Mary-Ann? Frasier: Yes, yes, lovely girl. You must be very proud. Zora: Oh, and relieved! Do you know that crazy son of mine was going steady with a juggler for three years? Crystal- somebody. [Frasier's ears prick up] Can you imagine having a daughter-in-law who throws things for a living? It's embarrassing. [She looks around, decides she doesn't like the lull, and hurls two plates to the floor.] Zora: DANCE, people! Let us celebrate tonight! [Zora goes off. Martin comes over.] Martin: Hey, Frasier, thanks for settling everything with Zora. Frasier: Oh, it's my pleasure, Dad. Martin: But, you know, I can't find Walt. I've been waiting five years for this reunion. Frasier: Must be here somewhere. Now, did you know that Nikos and Mary-Ann have only known each other for— Martin: Oh, there he is! [Walter Crane, Martin's younger brother [but older than Ed], waves.] Frasier: Well, this is so exciting! You two must have so much to talk about! Uncle Walt, hello! Walt: Frasier! Marty... Martin: Walt... Walt: What's new? Martin: Oh, same-old, same-old. How's tricks? Walt: Eh, can't complain. They keeping you busy? Martin: Oh, better believe it. Walt: Well, what're you gonna do? Martin: Tell me about it. Frasier: It's amazing how you two can pick up right where you left off. [Cut to: Later Frasier wanders over to a shelf of wine bottles. Curious, he takes two down to check the labels — revealing Niles's face hiding behind the shelf.] Niles: Psst! Put those back! Frasier: [noticing him] Niles! Do you realize how pathetic this is? Niles: I don't care! At dinner, Zora announced that I'd filed for divorce! Within seconds, Yvonne began purring so loudly my allergies kicked in! I won't be safe until this wedding is over! Frasier: The wedding I'm beginning to think might just be a serious mistake. Niles: Ooh, I like the sound of that. Does this mean you're going to meddle and get us both thrown out? Frasier: I can't! I promised I wouldn't! Niles: Oh, dear God, here she comes again! [As Yvonne comes over, Frasier turns around, his head hiding Niles's.] Yvonne: Hi, Frasier, have you seen Niles? Frasier: Why, no, I haven't. Yvonne: Oh! [goes off again] [Cut to: Later Daphne is sitting alone. Martin brings a plate of food over.] Martin: Here we go. Daphne: How much longer do we have stay? Martin: What are you in such a snit about? Daphne: This lot. Thanks to your sister-in-law they're all sniggering about me being your "physical therapist." Martin: Oh, don't let it bother you. She's always been a pain. Daphne: You're telling me. Dried-up old grape leaf! Martin: Yeah, and she's one to talk about reputations, too! Between you and me, before she married my brother, she was easier to make than a peanut butter sandwich! Daphne: [laughs] Does everyone know that? Martin: Well, everybody except my brother. I mean, I love him dearly, but he's not exactly the brightest bulb in the, uh... Daphne: Bulb box? Martin: Yeah. Shh, here's Eddie! [Ed comes over] Hey, Eddie! Where's the camera? Ed: Aha, then it worked. It's right here. [He flips up the tablecloth at the next table, revealing the camera pointed at Martin and Daphne's table. They blanche.] Ed: I decided to go undercover. I wanted to get people just being themselves. Martin: Oh well, we were really boring, believe me! Why don't you just rewind it a few minutes and tape over it? Ed: Funny. Mrs. Pappas said the same thing. [He moves off. In another corner, Frasier is seated opposite Nikos.] Frasier: So, why did you and this Crystal break up? I mean, I'm not meddling, I'm just curious, that's all. Nikos: It was a career conflict. She's a juggler, too. You may have heard of her — Crystal Baker? Frasier: No. I, uh, don't get to street theatre as often as I should. Nikos: Fabulous performer. Fabulous girl, for that matter. But, she wanted to work in Paris and I wanted to stay here. Frasier: Yes, well, there's always pressure on the two-career family. Nikos: We had a big fight about it. Then Mary-Ann came along. By the time Crystal got back, I was engaged. Frasier: And how did she take the news? Nikos: She was crushed. But she's been wonderful, like she called me a few nights ago to congratulate me. We talked for hours, just like old times. She's a sweetheart. Frasier: Yes, she's starting to sound like one. Nikos: Yeah, it was really great talking with her. I felt happy... purely happy. Maybe the last time I did. I mean, since then it's been all the usual pre-wedding stuff. You know, the jitters, night-sweats, vomiting. Frasier: Nikos, I promised your mother that I would never again interfere in your life— Nikos: Interfere? You saved me from making a terrible mistake! I- I value your advice above anything. Frasier: All right, then. In the interests of your future happiness, I feel it's my duty to let you know— [Zora comes over.] Zora: Nikos, please go make your Uncle Stavros to stop dancing on the table. [Nikos goes. She sits opposite Frasier.] Zora: Just once it would be nice to have a family gathering where no one leaves in an ambulance, am I right? Frasier: Yes, wouldn't it? [Martin and Daphne are following Ed around, trying to get at the camera.] Martin: Hey, Eddie, come on, you've been working ever since I've been here! You haven't even had a chance to chow down! Ed: Well, I wouldn't mind grabbing a bite. Martin: Well, hand me that thing, then. I know how to run that baby. Ed: [hands the camera over] Be careful, that tape is historic! Martin: Oh. Ed: I have interviewed every single living member of the family. I even went out to the retirement home and taped Nikos's great-grandmother — 101 years old. Martin: That's amazing. [Ed leaves] Wow, 101. Gosh, that's older than the century. She probably has got more stories than anybody else has... I can't do this. Daphne: Think you have to press this button right here. Martin: Oh, thanks. [He ejects the tape and merrily drops it into an urn on the floor.] Martin: Bye! [Daphne puts the lid on the urn. They slip away. Zora picks up a wireless microphone.] Zora: O.K., everybody, gather round, we're going to have some toasts here! So, if everybody will stop what they're doing for just one minute and come closer... [As Zora speaks, Frasier notices Niles peering out through the porthole in the kitchen door. He goes into the kitchen.] Frasier: For God's sake, Niles, why don't you just hide in the men's room? Niles: Where do you think Yvonne is right now? [checks out window] Where have you been? Frasier: Well, I've been on the phone. I've been trying to contact Nikos's ex-girlfriend. Niles: The depths you'll sink to to get a date. Frasier: I am convinced that he's still in love with her, and she with him! I thought if I could get the two of them together he might realize it in time. Niles, I couldn't reach her, she's out working tonight. I had to leave a message with her roommate. Niles: Well, perhaps the time has come for you to— [He ducks out the "Out" door just as Yvonne comes through the "In" door.] Yvonne: Hi. Frasier: Hello, Yvonne. [She goes out the "Out" door just as Niles ducks through the "In" door.] Niles: -stop playing games and start being direct! Zora: [o.s.] Frasier? Where's Frasier Crane? Frasier: Oh, dear God. [He goes out into the dining room. Niles follows him and sits down. All the guests are seated. Nikos and Mary-Ann stand together in the middle, with Zora hovering around them.] Zora: Ah, there you are! Come up here and make a toast to the happy couple! Frasier: Well, all right, I guess a thought or two comes to mind. [takes the microphone] Well, I've known Nikos all his life, and I'm sure that he realizes marriage is a binding commitment, not to be entered into hastily— Zora: [sensing trouble] But when the right one comes along, you know it! Hmm? Frasier: And that it's very important to-to find the person that you're most compatible with. The one who makes you feel happy . . . purely happy. Zora: More important, makes me feel happy, eh? Frasier: Of course, it would be a shame to go through life having to say, "if I'd only waited . . ." Zora: Hey, what the hell kind of toast is this, anyway?! Frasier: [getting his last shot in] I just want to make sure that my cousin marries the woman that he truly loves the most. Zora: Oh, well, there! Cheers, everybody! [takes the microphone] Oh, thank you, Frasier. If I may say a word or two? My son Nikos and I have had our ups and downs, but tonight, at this moment, I can honestly say— what the hell are you doing here?! [Crystal—a short dark-haired girl still wearing a clown costume and folie makeup painted on her face—has just entered.] Nikos: Crystal! Crystal: Nikos! I couldn't let you get married without... without letting you know that I-I... [She can't find the words. Instead, she grabs some long breadsticks and tosses one to Nikos. He picks up two more, and they start relay- juggling them.] Zora: Nikos, what are you doing? Stop it! Niles: [aside] How did she get the message? Frasier: Her roommate must have reached her on her car phone! Niles: Jugglers have car phones? Zora: Nikos, you are ruining everything! [to Crystal] You, shoo, shoo, shoo! [They ignore her and finish juggling. Nikos embraces her.] Mary-Ann: Nikos! Nikos! Nikos: I'm sorry, Mary-Ann, but Crystal's the one I'm meant to be with. Mary-Ann: I will never forgive you for this! [She turns to her parents, who are now beaming with relief.] Mary-Ann: Oh, see how happy you've made my parents?! [She storms out in a huff. Zora corners Frasier.] Zora: Frasier, he's lost his mind! Talk to him, he listens to you! Frasier: You remember my promise, no more meddling! [Nikos takes the microphone.] Nikos: Excuse me, everyone. This may not exactly be appropriate, but I have a toast too. To the man who reunited me with the woman I plan to spend my life with— Frasier: No, no, inappropriate! Toast time is over! Nikos: But we want to offer you our thanks— Frasier: No, no, no, no. You know what, everyone, why don't we do some bouzouki dancing? [He breaks into a feverish routine that makes me hysterical every time I watch it - rapping out "Ya-da-da-da!'s" while dancing the way a marionette version of Zorba the Greek might.] Zora: Why are they thanking you? [Crystal holds Frasier's hand.] Crystal: We owe our happiness to him. Frasier: [headed for the gallows] Why couldn't she have been a mime? Nikos: Once again, he saved me from making a terrible mistake. So, everyone, please lift your glasses to my cousin, Frasier Crane! Zora: Oh, I can do better than a glass! [She grabs a bottle by the neck and smashes the end off.] Frasier: No! Aunt Zora, no! Out of my way! [He flees into the kitchen, Zora right after him. As the noise grows, Niles and Daphne calmly get up and head out. Martin and Walt shake hands.] Martin: Well, Walt... Walt: Marty... Martin: Goodbye again. [He limps out of the restaurant. Nikos and Crystal kiss, the musicians play, the dancers dance, and the party goes on as the sounds of crashes and Frasier's screams for mercy continue from the kitchen.] [Scene Z – Restaurant Through the viewfinder of the video camera, we see Niles sitting in a chair, Yvonne enthusiastically pawing him. He motions to Ed to pose with Yvonne.] [The camera shifts around as it changes hands, then Ed sits down next to Yvonne. Then the camera turns over as Niles hastily puts it down, pointing at the kitchen doors.] [Niles hastily retreats into the kitchen. Yvonne follows him in. Niles retreats out again, with her right after him.]

Guest Appearances

 Special Guest Stars
 PATTIT LuPONE as Zora
 
 Guest Starring
 VALERIE DILLMAN as Mary-Ann
 JAMES GLEASON as Ed
 LORI HARMON as Yvonne
 HEIDI KARP as Crystal
 JOHN MAHON as Walt
 JOSEPH WILL as Nikos

Legal Stuff

 This episode capsule is copyright 2000 by Nick Hartley & Mike Lee. 
 This episode summary remains property of Frasier, Copyright
 of Paramount Productions and NBC. Printed without permission. 

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